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Commentary: In Playing the Field, Can You Really Win?

The rules all change once someone catches feelings.

Dating multiple men at once may seem like a good idea at first. But ultimately, it’s all fun and games until one or both parties begin to catch feelings.

I’m sure I’m not the only one with a friend who lives proudly by the the words, if a man can do it, so can I.  At a point in time, my friend even coined herself the female version of the infamous womanizer, Don Juan. Now, I can appreciate the whole aspect of living for today while being young and free, but at some point you have to realize that playing with fire — in her case, a steamy love triangle — will only get you burned. And she soon felt the heat.

After going on a date with Mr. Number One, he insisted they stop by his co-worker’s house warming party. To her surprise, when she walked in she immediately locked eyes with boo Number Two. Oh, snap!  He made his way across the room and started questioning her on the spot. Once both men realized what was going on, it was a done deal. They both broke off all ties, leaving her devastated.
Previously, when she was having problems with Mr. Number One, she would fall into the arms of boo Number Two, but now she had no one. To make matters worse, since the drama unfolded both men have become really good friends and honestly, she hasn’t been the same since.

Let’s face it: When it comes to dating and playing the field, it’s a dangerous game. As women, we’re more in touch with our emotions, and walking away from an entire situation as if it never occurred is challenging, especially once sex becomes involved. 

If nothing else, use my friend as a cautionary tale about the woes of playing the field. If you don’t see the potential in one of your suitors early on, let him go, because it might actually hurt your chances of finding Mr. Right.

The opinions expressed here do not necessarily reflect those of BET Networks.

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(Photo: Sonja Pacho/Corbis)

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