Commentary: Staying Away From the Bitter Betty Blues
Ever wonder why you aren’t further along in your career than you should be? Why your love life seems to be non-existent? Why the plans you had set for your life five years ago seem to be lingering and a distant memory? The truth is, life has a way of getting us down and honestly many of us aren't where we would ideally like to be in life, especially among the millennial generation. Labeled as the most “stressed generation,” the coming-of-age phase experienced in our mid-to-late twenties can be contributed as one of the main reasons.
There is no denying we all have felt the “Bitter Betty Blues” every now and again, especially with the everyday hustle and bustle of establishing work-life balance. Let’s face it, everyone goes through ups and downs, but if one insists on staying in the stagnant mind frame of “woe is me,” one will never experience growth. Unfortunately, from personal experience, I know this feeling all too well. I felt I could relate to Tupac’s mantra, “Me Against the World,” with every setback, failure, challenge and heartbreak I experienced. But honestly, what was I doing to yield different results? The reinforcement of positive thinking and surrounding myself with like-minded people proved challenging, especially since complacency, gossip, fear and doubt had a way of wheeling me in.
The effects of negative thinking, carrying emotional baggage and surrounding ourselves with toxic people are a formula for disaster. Unfortunately, we allow ourselves to continuously hold onto people/things because of the illusion and expectation we have created. Only in the end do we realize it has caused us more stress and frustration more than anything else. Coming to this realization is no easy task but sometimes the truth hurts, right?
Some tips that may be useful in getting over the “Bitter Betty” hump:
· Digital Detox – Live your life and take a social media break.
· Thank You – Write down the things or people you are thankful for. It can serve as a source of therapy. I assure you the things you find gratitude in will outweigh any and all negatives.
· Evaluate the Larger Picture – You are assessing the importance of the situation and how it can/will affect you in the long run by not looking at the glass half full.
· Talk vs. Dwell – Communicate! Talk about your problems, but don’t dwell in regrets. Discussing your problems is therapeutic and allows you to find solace.
No one ever wants to be labeled as the “Bitter Betty” of the group. And while no one wants to hear the cliché “look on the bright side,” it’s true. Next time life gets you down, try to ask yourself this one simple question, “Will all of this really matter a year from now?”
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